How to be a Great-Grandmother … or a Great Grandmother

 

Do you see the difference in the two designations in the title of this blog?

Great-grandmother is a single noun indicating the mother of your grandmother. That’s me.

Great Grandmother is an adjective and a noun indicating a really wonderful grandmother. According to my grandchildren, that’s me, too!

But let’s begin at the beginning.

In the beginning, I was an 18-year-old wife to an 18-year-old husband. My kids laugh at how often I explain decisions and actions in those early years by saying, “We were young and didn’t know what we were doing.”

Then I was a 25-year-old mother of three children and my standard explanation became, “We were young, and we REALLY didn’t know what we were doing.

When grandchildren arrived, I no longer cared if I knew what I was doing.  I just had to find a grandmother name, then love and play with the kids.

Some have said the child determines what you will be called, but it seemed inconvenient to wait until Sydnie could talk to find my name, although I have no doubt she could have handled it well.  My grandmother’s name was Grandma Vidal. Except in one cousin group, who called her MeeMaw. I remember being confused as a child.

I was not regal enough for Grandmother, not creative enough for Bibi, and not beautiful enough for Glammy. So, I looked for something easy to say and easy to spell. I landed on Nana as a take on my actual name and because my kids loved the Tomie dePaola book, Nana Upstairs & Nana Downstairs.

And Nana it has been for 31 years. Happy birthday, Sydnie.

In those 31 years, we have added to our group of grandchildren. Stephanie had four children while in her 20’s. Jennifer had two children while in her 30s. Ben had one child and is expecting another in June – all while in his 40s.  Two of our oldest are now married, which means I added two more grandchildren.

For those tracking, I currently have ten grandchildren ranging in age from 32 to “coming soon.”

We have taken vacations to church camp to Disney World, to Ireland on cruises. We have read books and played games and outfitted swing sets in the backyard. We have attended weddings and sports events and concerts and graduations.  We participated in Nana Camps and Poppy Days.

So, the first definition, as great grandmother is related to the fact that I am a grandmother in a mutual admiration relationship with those ten grandchildren. I tell them they are great. They tell me I am great. Therefore, I am a great grandmother.

And now the second definition.  With the birth of Percy, I have legally qualified as a great-grandmother.  I am the mother of a grandmother, which qualifies me for the title.

Even though Percy lives away from family at this time, I expect to use my developing grandparent skills, personal references from his cousins, and technology tools such as FaceTime, Tonie, and Yoto.  And if all goes well, I may soon qualify for a third definition – one more hyphen with this new generation - a great great-grandmother.